GREAT British Bake Off fans will be able to judge the Victoria sponges of strangers under new support schemes.
As the show moves to Channel 4 where it will never be heard from again, self-help groups have sprung up to deal with the loss.
Roy Hobbs said: “We’ll meet in a church hall every Thursday evening to mutter that a woman we’ve never met is a stuck-up bitch whose shortbread looks shit.
“The verger’s wife has just left him and he’s had his hair dyed and bought a motorbike to compensate so we’ve even got our own Paul Hollywood lined up.”
Psychologists say that withdrawal symptoms from the show are linked to the part of the brain that deals with mourning, grief and the desire for cake.
The support groups will raise funds to hire a writer to come up with double-entendres about sogginess and moisture by selling the cakes they make which will in turn be criticised for their sogginess or lack of moisture.