CHILDREN across the UK are being encouraged to celebrate One Britain One Nation day by singing a creepy patriotic dirge. What would be a more appropriate choice?
Ghost Town, The Specials
‘The people getting angry’, ‘All the clubs have been closed down’, ‘No job to be found’. Whether it’s the result of Covid, Brexit or both, the lyrics of this hit from 1981 are highly applicable to our current situation.
Everything is Awesome, The Lego Movie
Just like the One Nation, One Britain song, this track is chock full of vacuous crap about how brilliant it is to mindlessly believe everything is wonderful. The big difference though is that the Lego song is actually catchy and also has a large dollop of sarcasm baked in.
Ooh Aah… Just a Little Bit, Gina G
Now that we’re out of the EU, we should reclaim our Eurovision songs, the best of which is this mighty anthem from 1997. Also, Gina G is Australian, which might firm up the trade deal Boris Johnson has been so obsessed with.
Stuck in the Middle With You, Stealers Wheel
The lyrics ‘Trying to make some sense of it all, but I see it makes no sense at all’ and ‘Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right’ are the perfect way to introduce small children to our current political shit show. It’s also got a tune, which is good in a song.
Land of Hope and Glory, Edward Elgar
Given that a miserable, hyper-patriotic turd of a song celebrating the wonder of Britain already exists, why not use it instead? Stuff like ‘How shall we extol thee, who are born of thee’ is incredibly pompous, but still better than ‘Strong Britain, great nation’ repeated four times.