Han and Chewie ‘met on Grindr’
THE new Star Wars film has revealed that Han Solo and Chewbacca met on a gay dating app and were lovers for 20 years.
Solo, which tells the story of how a young Han Solo renounced the love of women for a cross-species relationship with his co-pilot, begins as a familiar paw swipes right on the image of a handsome spacefarer.
The duo meet and, after a long, tender sequence where Han shampoos Chewie and picks lice out of his fur, make love while hologram chessmen battle in the foreground.
A brief, but intense, love triangle ensues between the couple and swinger from beyond the stars Lando Calrissian, who instead settles down with a polyamorous symbiotic shapeshifter that takes the form of his moustache.
Star Wars superfan Joseph Turner said: “What? It’s all there in the original trilogy if you take the trouble to learn Wookie. Every roar echoes with longing.
“Next thing you’ll be saying you didn’t know about C-3PO and R2D2.”