Lady Gaga plays to freaks, misfits and outsiders at Lib Dem conference

POP star Lady Gaga has made a surprise appearance in Glasgow playing to shunned outcasts from society at the Lib Dem conference. 

The star, who appeared wearing a shocking dress made out of a comatose Charles Kennedy, has embraced the party faithful who are feared and hated by ordinary people.

She said: “They laugh at us. They spit on us. They tell us the way we want to live is wrong.

“But we were born this way!”

Sign up now to get
The Daily Mash
free Headlines email – every weekday

More butterflies living long enough to become wasps

WARM weather has helped butterflies complete their life cycle by becoming wasps.

New research shows the UK has a growing butterfly population, with a corresponding increase in wasps as the fragile winged insects complete their final mind-bending transformation.

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “It’s known in biology as the Gremlins principle – the process by which an appealing creature turns into something armour-plated and highly aggressive for no apparent evolutionary reason.

“Something broadly similar also happens with a sexy naked lady in the poor quality science fiction film Species.

“It also explains why you never see little baby wasps flying around.”

Wasp Emma Bradford said: “Life is so mental. Last week I was a Peacock butterfly, admired by young and old alike.

“Now I have a hard exoskeleton and a pointy thing on my arse, and am widely shunned.

“My growing bitterness will soon translate into stinging.”