Mulholland Drive voted best film by group of drooling perverts

DAVID Lynch’s Mulholland Drive has been voted the best film of the 21st century by a group of disgusting and sweaty men.

Mulholland Drive narrowly beat Blue is the Warmest Colour  and Nymphomaniac Parts 1 and 2 in a diverse top three linked only by high levels of artistic achievement.

Lonely wank monster and internet film critic Martin Bishop said: “The cinematography is simply to die for and the story is both thought-provoking and poetic.

Plus you can knock one out about six times throughout the film and not get bored.”

He added: “However there is a bit where Naomi Watts is walking round the back of a diner and something happens. Don’t be doing anything then because it’s going to scare the shit out of you and you might end up injuring yourself.”

David Lynch said: “It’s definitely my sexiest film, apart perhaps from The Elephant Man.”