A MOTHER-OF-TWO is still on the sofa clutching a glass of red wine since hearing Adele’s new song Hello.
Family members found 33-year-old Emma Bradford curled up under a knitted blanket with a strange, regretful look in her eyes.
Her partner Stephen Malley said: “After dinner she said she was going to listen to the new Adele song, which the kids and I took as a warning to stay out of the living room.
“This morning the door was still closed. I opened it warily to find her motionless on the sofa with a glass of wine in her left hand, a soft centre chocolate in her right and the laptop still open on the Adele song YouTube page.
“She won’t speak or make eye contact. I tried playing some 90s hip hop which always annoys her, but she just pulled the blanket over her head.”
Bradford’s six-year-old daughter Rosie said: “Mummy’s gone. Adele took her to a place and she never came back.”
Psychologist Nikki Hollis said: “The powerful sad emotions in Adele songs can overload the female cerebrum with memories of getting dumped. We call it ‘going into the A-zone’.
“The listener becomes locked inside bittersweet visions of skimming stones on a Dorset beach with a tousled-haired boy who went on to finger her cousin. The only cure is for the sufferer to hear the song again and again until it starts getting on their tits.”