Open-air Shakespeare much easier to just f**k off from

OPEN-AIR productions of Shakespeare are much easier to sneak away from when you get bored, is has been confirmed.

Audience members at a recent production of Measure for Measure in Cardiff’s Bute Park found that the unenclosed setting meant they did not have sit all the way through one of the Bard’s dreaded ‘comedies’.

Susan Traherne said: “All Shakespeare should be like this.

“We only realised when the teenagers next to us nipped behind some foliage for a spliff that we were unpoliced and could free ourselves from all the iambic pentameter.

“At the bit where the Duke disguises himself as a monk – which made my stomach lurch with fear at what hilarity was to come – we simply packed up our picnic and fucked off back to the telly.

“I’ve never watched 24 Hours in A&E with more joy.”

Actor Julian Cook said: “Actually in the early 17th Century a lot of people would bugger off early and go home and stare at their mud walls instead, so it’s historically accurate.”