TWO decades after the Post Office scandal began, the government has noticed it because it was on television. These dramas will get their respective scandals attention:
Sea of Shite, 9pm, ITV1
A hard-hitting drama following 57 triathalon swimmers who contracted E coli while competing because the sea was full of untreated human waste. Miriam Margoyles as environment minister Claire Coffey says ‘We had no reason to doubt the water companies’ assurances that the sea was fine.’
Mone Alone, 9pm, ITV1
Four-part drama following the PPE scandal of Baroness Mone and her husband, who profited from the pandemic by supplying overpriced equipment which was unfit for use. Anne Marie-Duff plays Mone, assuring Matt Hancock he has no reason to check her credentials as a provider of vital medical equipment during a national crisis.
This Train Doesn’t Stop There Anymore, 10pm, ITV2
Dramatisation of disastrous train privatisation which left British commuters paying the highest prices for the worst services in Europe. Sir Patrick Stewart as Chris Grayling says ‘We had no reason to believe that the rail companies were anything other than dedicated servants of their passengers.’
Moscow-on-Thames, ITVX, on demand
Investigative drama following the flow of Russian money into London and their purchase of property, businesses and newspapers which allowed them to wield outsize influence on British politics even while Putin was poisoning dissidents. Brian Blessed as Lord Eugene Lebedev hisses ‘I am Boris’s mate so you have no reason to f**k with me, get it?’
The Met Ball, ITV3, 9pm
Dramatisation of the corruption within the Metropolitan Police which regularly sees them cover up shootings, corruption, lawbreaking by newspapers and Partygate. Kristen Scott Thomas as Commissioner Cressida Dick says ‘Listen, I got promoted after leading an operation that killed an innocent unarmed Brazilian. That’s just the way this shit works.’
Truss Me, I’m An Economist, ITV1, 7pm
Light-hearted comedy following the farcical misadventures of Sally Phillips as Liz Truss, the hapless minister who can’t do anything right but still gets promoted! After a hilarious two-month spell as prime minister where she kills the Queen and crashes the economy, gives all her mates knighthoods and take a £125,000 annual pension. Oddly, viewers do not find this funny at all.