Tuesday, 4th August 2020

Woman almost leaves Hollyoaks on

A WOMAN who almost left Hollyoaks on while in front of the television has told friends how shaken she was by the near-miss. 

Helen Archer, aged 25, was on her phone and failed to realise that The Simpsons had ended and the pre-teen soap opera had begun.

She said: “I looked up and there was this weird thing with pretty people dancing around in front of unfeasibly colourful backdrops, like a cross between a reality show and those bingo adverts they have on MTV.

“Then someone apparently called BMW McGunther marched in, dressed head to toe in street lamps and screamed, 'That's my baby's father you're robbing a bank with,’ at some form of sexy vicar.

“After that it segued into some blondes on barstools in what appeared to be an advert for Instagram, then one of them mentioned Chester and I realised it was actual Hollyoaks and lunged for the control.

“They should have some kind of warning before they screen it, not just a Domino’s sponsorship ident. What if I’d ended up following it? What if it got me?”