BRITAIN has returned to buying clothes from Marks and Spencer after realising that caring about appearances is shallow and worthless.
After years of falling clothes sales M&S is benefiting from a new trend in simply wanting to cover our naked bodies with some material held together by thread.
Martin Bishop, from Peterborough, said: “I want to wear trousers but I don’t want to care about the trousers. I just want them to be trousers and I think that’s all M&S wants too.
“With the Blue Harbour range M&S clearly started with the concept of just making some clothes. No fashion statements, no desire to appeal to individuality, just clothing distilled to its most basic essence.
“It’s like being a Chinese communist. I love it.”
Jane Thompson, an averagely proportioned person from Stevenage, added: “I have wasted so much money on clothes. It is insane.
“Now I just want people to appreciate me for who I am. That’s why I went to M&S and bought these purple and beige culottes, even though they didn’t have them in my size and apparently never will.”