Pope and Imam 'would make horrible couple'

POPE Benedict and Imam Ahmed Mohamed el-Tayeb would be a really horrible couple, it has been confirmed.

The pair were depicted kissing passionately in a Benetton advert, raising the prospect of them getting together to form one big ball of judgemental hate.

Nikki Hollis, a relationship consultant, said: “You’d invite them over and they would sit there making barbed comments about everything until you felt like a total shit.

“They’d finish each other sentences and give each other knowing glances about the food. It would be like having dinner with Richard and Judy.”

She added: “Eventually they wouldn’t have any friends anyway and then they’d just sit in their front room making little lists.”

Meanwhile the Vatican has condemned the advert because it showed the Pope kissing a man who is not a child molester.

A Vatican spokesman said: “This is a clear example of how advertising can violate elementary rules of respect for people. And we wrote the book on violation, so back off.

“And I don’t see how this campaign is supposed to end hatred because I now hate Benetton as much as I hate homosexuals. Advert fail.”

The campaign also features Benjamin Netanyahu kissing Mahmoud Abbas, President Obama kissing Hu Jintao and Kate Middleton kissing Pippa Middleton because Benetton said it also wanted to raise awareness of hot lesbian incest.

The Islamic world was equally shocked by the advert with street crowds in Pakistan setting fire to a large pile of overpriced jumpers.

Ahmed Kahn said: “Unless Benetton releases a photograph of the Imam beheading the Pope with a gigantic sword, then all their jumpers will die.”


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