Successful team building weekend focuses on how much everyone hates company

A TEAM-BUILDING weekend has succeeded because it focused on workers’ shared loathing of their employer.

Staff from Piper Redmond Insurance gathered at a Holiday Inn near Worcester for what they imagined would be another tedious weekend of raft building, inane group discussions and lifeless ‘creative games’.

However their enthusiasm immediately increased when they were asked to brainstorm ‘Why Piper Redmond Insurance is such a massive piece of shit’.

Low-paid admin drone Nikki Hollis said: “Normally I can’t think of anything to say in these so-called ‘workshops’ but I detest my employer so much I actually wore out three whiteboard markers.

“I even invented a new swearword ‘penisbags’. I’m definitely realising my untapped potential.”

Sales assistant Tom Booker said: “There was a really cool brainstorming session about to take your revenge for not getting a pay rise again this year. I said I would put a viper in the MD’s golf bag that would go up his arm and bite his face, the trainer said that was very creative.

“Weirdly I hated everyone at work until this weekend but now I feel we’ve really bonded. We’re going to meet up next weekend to lob our computers off the fire escape.”