Daily Mail readers not happy until Meghan is working in Primark

UNTIL Meghan Markle is flogging cut-price clothes on a minimum wage Daily Mail readers are not going to be satisfied.     

Fairly uninteresting plans by the Duke and Duchess of Sussex to do a podcast and sign a Netflix deal have made Mail readers psychotically angry yet again.

Donna Sheridan said: “I can’t believe the cheek of them trying to make money to live off instead of relying on the taxpayer like proper royals.

“I’d like to see Meghan doing shifts in Primark for a pittance. She should be endlessly picking t-shirts off the floor with dozens of morons staring at her and laughing. That or scrubbing toilets.

“I’m not bothered about other celebs like Gwyneth Paltrow making money in weird ways. It’s just that Meghan. There’s something about her that annoys me. I can’t quite put my finger on it.”

Fellow Mail reader Norman Steele said: “If they were that desperate for cash Harry would be flogging his crowns on Ebay and she’d get herself on that Only Fans.  

“Personally I think they made their choice so it’s only right they should be on the streets begging for scraps of food and selling their bodies for sex.”  

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Parents replicate school 'Christmas fayre' with massive bag of Haribo and £50 to the PTA

PARENTS missing out on the joy of the school Christmas fayre this year are recreating the experience by stuffing their kids with sweets and giving away 50 quid.

Mums and dads who have already spent the year shelling out for uniforms, school lunches and quickly-abandoned extra-curricular activities like piano lessons are sad that the costly event has been cancelled. 

Dad Martin Bishop said: “We always look forward to the annual carnival of forced jollity and super-efficient money-extraction that is the Christmas fayre.

“I love being fleeced out of £50 for face-painting, a weird bottle of aftershave off the tombola and a tree decoration made of twigs and wool. And I’m gutted I didn’t feel obliged to buy a stodgy homemade fruit cake.

“But for me the highlight is having the kids shrieking like banshees though the house until midnight because of the amount of sweets they’ve necked.

“The fayre can’t take place this year, so will make our own memories in these strange times by sending that £50 to the PTA and making little Oliver demolish a massive bag of Haribo in two minutes flat. 

“It’s what Jesus would have wanted.”