ESTHER Rantzen has been present at every key moment in human history, it has emerged.
Besides being involved in the Savile affair and the current police corruption scandal, the broadcaster has participated in every significant event including the Battle of Agincourt, the moon landing and the invention of the internet.
Rantzen said: I dont like to blow my own trumpet, but it was me who got the ancient Egyptians to build the pyramids, to raise money for Children in Need.
And I doubt wed have won the Battle of Agincourt if I hadnt told Henry V, Dont just sit there like a wet dishcloth, go and give your men an inspiring speech!
It was the same with the Normandy landings. Theres no way the allied troops would have got off the beaches if I hadnt taken out all those German machine gun nests.
And goodness knows how Buzz and Neil would have got back from the Moon if I hadnt been there to fix the thrusters with a bit of common sense and female intuition.
Rantzen said she had also played a part in the discovery of fire, the Relief of Mafeking and the creation of the internet, which came about when she told Tim Berners-Lee it would be a good idea to connect lots of computers together.
She added: I worked with Shakespeare on a play called The Smutty Vegetables of Stratford, which I would later develop into the hit series Thats Life!