Thursday, 6th May 2021

'Gwyneth fanny candle explosion' is a sentence that makes sense in 2021

THE sentence ‘Gwyneth fanny candle explosion’ is one that makes perfect sense to people in the dystopia of 2021. 

When confronted with the four-word sentence, a majority of Britons nodded sagely and said ‘yes, I expected something like this would happen’ without any need for further explanation.

Asked to elaborate, 68-year-old Susan Traherne said: “Gwyneth Paltrow the actress and lifestyle brand, I presume?

“Yes, I remember last year she produced candles that bore the odour of her vagina. So I assume that one of said candles was lit, overheated, and produced an A-list-pussy-scented conflagration of some kind?

“That’s exactly what happened? Ah. Then I’m in hell and we’re all in hell. Nowhere else would that make sense.”