ACTOR Tom Hiddleston has apologised for being a massive ponce.
The Night Manager star claims he thought he was just debonair, but has since realised that he is in fact a ponce.
He said: “This morning I was having my ‘brekkie’ of a boiled quail’s egg, in preparation for a boating trip with my friends Algie and Roper, and looking in the newspaper for pictures of myself as I do on a daily basis.
“It emerged that my Golden Globes speech, which I gave whilst receiving a statuette for an admittedly stellar performance, had attracted some scathing notices.
“Reflecting on this, it became clear to me that I am a huge posh ponce who loves showing off. I am deeply sorry.”
He added: “I am great though.”
Twitter user Martin Bishop said: “Hanging’s too good for actors who are a bit up themselves, even if my wife does like him. He’ll probably turn up in some old-fashioned convertible car and steal her away to a dinner dance.”