UNINTERESTING men have hailed Mark Wahlberg as their god.
Wahlberg, who has slightly less screen presence than Roly from Grange Hill, earned $68 million last year from a series of shit films, mostly about massive robots.
Run-of-the-mill bloke Tom Logan, 35, said: “I have always felt criminally under-represented in film and television because I am about as interesting as a microwave instruction manual.
“But the humdrum have been marginalised for too long. Mark Wahlberg’s success is a beacon of hope for those of us who have been lightly beaten with the averageness stick.
“I will go forth into the world now with a new sense of confidence. If Wahlberg can earn a shitload of money by mumbling at a camera, then I can do it to by being an IT solutions support specialist.”