Big fat cat is totally body-confident

AN OVERWEIGHT cat is not at all self-conscious about it, he has confirmed.

Massive cat Oscar has no problems with weighing 48 per cent more than the vet reckons he should, even if local kids body-shame him with names like ‘Fat Puss’ and ‘Commander Tubs’.

He said: “I’m a greedy bastard and I don’t give a fuck.

“If I spot a Cornetto wrapper in the kitchen bin I’ll drag it out and lick that sucker clean, because that’s how I operate. It’s shame-free bin dining.

“My motto is ‘more food’. It’s a simple belief system but it works for me.”

However Oscar denied that he was actively helping to empower other larger cats.

He said: “I don’t like any other cats, especially the fat ones because they’re clearly getting treats that could be mine.”

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