SCIENTISTS have discovered a python of below average length that makes up for it by cracking jokes.
Shortly after the longest python on record was found in Malaysia, researchers located its far shorter cousin, Tom Logan, who is less than a metre and a half long but does funny stuff like putting moss on his head and pretending it is a wig.
Professor Henry Brubaker of the Institute for Studies said: “This is the first time we’ve seen a shorter animal that compensates, or perhaps over-compensates, for its small size by relentlessly making gags of varying quality.
“Larger predators seems to avoid it, perhaps because they find it tiresome.”
Short python Tom Logan said: “I’m all about the banter.
“Sometimes I like to lie in a straight line between two round stones, so that I look like a penis and testicles. Everyone loves that, it’s classic.
“I just come up with this stuff off the top of my head.”
Elephant Nikki Hollis said: “He’s okay in very small doses.”
