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Scots Demand Huge Increase In Global Warming

A MAJORITY of Scots are backing a total reliance on fossil fuels in a bid to deliver up to three months of t-shirt weather every year.

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Iran To Perform Salman Rushdie Knighthood

IRAN last night offered to perform Sir Salman Rushdie's forthcoming knighthood ceremony saying recent television footage suggested the Queen was no longer "up to the job". 

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