Saturday, 26th September 2020

Woman stares at cup of tea wondering if she made it

A WOMAN is staring at a steaming mug of tea in front of her, wondering if she made it and if not who the hell did. 

Carolyn Ryan, who is working from home, prodded the tea with one finger to confirm it was indeed hot and fresh and real.

She said: “But I’ve been sitting here. Haven’t I?

“I’d remember getting up and going to the kitchen. And putting the kettle on. And the whole reasonably lengthy tea-making process. And I don’t.

“But the only other explanation is there’s an intruder, making tea, or Steve’s home but he can’t be or I wouldn’t have a porn window open on my laptop, so it must be me.

“I’m an intelligent person. Yet I can’t even send myself an email reminder without immediately checking my phone beep to see who the new email’s from.

“Last week I lost my phone, spent an hour calling it to find it, and then was surprised to have 49 missed calls. Anyway. Tea.”