Couple who ‘only smoke when drinking’ drinking a lot

A COUPLE who claim to only to have the occasional cigarette with a glass of wine appear to be drinking six nights a week, friends have noticed.  

Martin Bishop and Nikki Hollis claim to have ‘practically given up’ and ‘just have a cheeky one’ when drinking socially, which apparently includes any random Wednesday night in.

Friend Helen Archer said: “You can’t text without being invited round, and as soon as you’re through the door the Merlot’s open and they’re out the back having a fag.

“They make a big song and dance of standing at the back door until the second bottle by which time they’re sparking up at the kitchen table and pulling a well-used ashtray out of a drawer.

“And they’ve started to go the pub ‘just the two of them’ all the time, which has nothing to do with ‘getting to know the area’ and everything to do with their aching need to blaze it under the heatlamp.

“Once they’re pissed one of them will say that a GP friend told them you can smoke five cigarettes a day with a negligible effect, usually whilst opening another pack of twenty.

“Obviously I have one if they’re offering. It’s just a social thing with me.”