GREY days and long nights making you blue? You might be suffering from SAD, or this might just be the worst f**king winter of any of our lives. Find out:
You’re listless, depressed and it seems like there’s no point to anything. How long have you been feeling this way?
A) Since around the end of September
B) Since around the beginning of March
What’s getting you down the most?
A) The short days, the long nights and the lack of natural light
B) The lockdown, being unable to see family or friends, unable to go the pub, impending financial ruin, the certain knowledge it will all go on for much longer than it has to because the government can’t do anything right, and it being a bit dark I guess
Have you become less sociable?
A) Yes, because the nights are drawing in
B) Yes, because it’s illegal
Have you struggled to concentrate at work?
A) Yes, it can be hard to focus on invoices when the weather’s so miserable
B) Yes, it can be hard to focus on invoices when there’s a plague racking up hundreds of deaths a day
When do you think you’ll feel better?
A) Probably when it starts brightening up in spring
B) When everyone’s had the vaccine, there’s a decent Brexit deal, Boris goes, billions in government debt gets forgiven and I can hug my mum again
Mostly As: This sounds like a classic case of Seasonal Affective Disorder, so get yourself an SAD lamp and order some vitamin D supplements from Holland & Barrett.
Mostly Bs: The good news is you haven’t got SAD, but the bad news is you’re right and everything is f**ked. Get yourself an SAD lamp and use it to grow weed.