LONDON Marathon participants have been warned that the wall they went through was just a figure of speech.
Hospitals are reporting an influx of marathon veterans with injuries from deliberately running into the sides of buildings.
Retail assistant Tom Booker said: “Yesterday during the marathon I conquered ‘the wall’ by pushing on after my legs turned to jelly.
“So it seemed logical that I am now the master of walls, and when leaving work this morning I decided to leap through the side of the room instead of using the door.
“Now I have a badly broken collarbone and the frankly quite arsey nurses have given me a book about simple physics. And to think, yesterday I was a hero.”
Doctor Stephen Malley said: “Figurative language can be confusing, especially among running obsessives who tend to have limited imaginations.
“My advice is don’t be a fucking idiot.”