A THIRD of the UK on the edge of developing Type II diabetes just went ahead and got it.
Research found one in three people was at severe risk of contracting the life-threatening condition before they had a Maltesers Party Pouch for lunch and now it’s too late.
Dr Helen Archer said: A full third of the population are in danger of joining the 3.2 million with diabetes. Actually, thatll be two-fifths of the population and 4.8 million now because Ive been here almost 20 minutes.
“Shockingly, even members of our own research team were in danger of Dave, is that an empty box of Mr Kipling French Fancies on your desk?
Dave, weve talked about this. Let me just check yep, youve got it. Go and join the queue for insulin along with everyone else.
Diabetes sufferers are advised to have a high-sugar food on hand at all times in case of blood sugar crashes as if they hadnt all been wearing bandoliers stuffed with Boost bars for years.
Wayne Hayes of Sunderland said: I started reading about it while I was eating my KFC Wicked Variety Bucket, and it was pretty scary stuff until I had to stop because my vision was too blurred.
Pass a few of those Red Bulls over, would you? I seem to be having trouble moving.