Thursday, 29th October 2020

Twat wearing mask under her nose doing it on purpose

A WOMAN who goes to the shops wearing a mask over her mouth but not her nose has confirmed she is doing it just to annoy the f**k out of everyone.

Nikki Hollis knows that only covering one of the germ-exhaling holes in her face is pointless but has admitted she just enjoys seeing the looks of irritation on the faces of fellow shoppers.

Hollis said: “You’ve got to find some way to have fun during a global pandemic and mine is to distress strangers by not being able to properly perform one incredibly basic task.

“I really enjoy drifting round the aisles of Sainsbury’s, sneezing on the Shreddies and standing uncomfortably close to people in the checkout queue.

“What’s most entertaining is that I can see I’m really making them agitated but they feel unable to say anything because they assume I’m not wearing the mask properly because I’m a bit thick.

“The truth is that I’m a bit thick but also a very horrible person. Such fun.”