9/11 White House photos show Cheney looking guilty as hell

PHOTOS from inside the White House on September 11th 2001 show Dick Cheney looking exactly as you would expect if the conspiracy theories were true.

The former vice president is shown yawning, smirking and with his feet up on his desk. Experts have suggested this could be seen as inconsistent with someone who was incredibly surprised and angry.

Professor Henry Brubaker, from the Institute for Studies, said: “At the very least, it’s almost as if he immediately saw the advantages accruing from a mass terror attack on the US and became very chilled out by the prospect.

“It’s almost as if he had some kind of game plan that he had been refining over several years. Or maybe not. It’s just a theory based on some photographs of his actual face.”

Cheney said: “I always put my feet on the desk when I’m in a state of total shock.

“And I yawn when I’m filled with adrenalin and a burning desire for revenge.”

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Camping trip only planned to heighten appreciation of house

A FAMILY are spending a weekend camping in order to really appreciate their three bedroom house.

The Logans are spending three nights in a field near Delamere Forest, during which they will sleep on the cold ground, trudge across wet fields to a barbaric communal lavatory, and eat beans from a pan like refugees from a zombie apocalypse.

Tom Logan said: “Our home is rather nondescript and we can take it for granted or even resent its ordinariness. But it does have clean water, electricity and a toilet that wasn’t designed for animals.

“So every year we spend three days living inside what is essentially a plastic bag while trying not to go to the toilet so that when we come home our house seems like the Dorchester Hotel.”

Daughter Jenna Logan, aged 13, said: “It really makes you think of how refugees must be suffering and makes you glad you are not them.

“That’s it. That’s as much as I got from it.”