Tuesday, 11th May 2021

Remainers really wishing Jean-Claude Juncker wasn't such a git

PEOPLE who want to remain in the EU really wish Jean-Claude Juncker was not so obviously unpleasant.

Remainers across the country admitted they would feel a lot less conflicted if Britain could be negotiating with someone like Antoine de Caunes instead.

Emma Bradford said: “When you see Juncker messing with that woman's hair or generally coming across like a bloke on Channel 5 who drinks his own piss, I do experience a flicker of doubt.

“And if he could remember to wear the right coloured shoes that would also be a pretty solid bonus.”

Fellow Remainer, Martin Bishop, added: “Michel Barnier comes across okay. At least in that loveless stepfather who's also a teacher at your school and doesn't own a TV kind of way.

“Why can't we be negotiating with ABBA?”