Tuesday, 11th May 2021

Trump demands introduction of Super Double Caps Lock

DONALD Trump has demanded that a Super Double Caps Lock be created to better convey the force of his feelings on Twitter. 

Trump believes that computer keyboards need a new key to represent how emphatic and powerful his words are.

A White House spokesman said: “When the president typed ‘SEE YOU IN COURT!’ it was commanding, impressive and resolute.

“But unfortunately YouTube commenters calling pop videos ‘THE GAYMOST’ have lessened the impact of capital letters, meaning the tweet came across as impotent rage from a bewildered adult baby.

“Super Double Caps Lock will leave the world in awe with a series of epochal tweets about his daughter’s shoe line and a fabric softener commercial he feels is disrespecting him.”

Joe Turner, from Kansas City, said: “Has he tried using a whole bunch of exclamation marks? That always makes everyone take me seriously.”