14-year-old Active J, known in his detached home as Joshua Hudson, represents his school house in a rap battle for respect and house points.
Wagwan? Active J is chill now, but man woz low today, fam. Man woz disrespectfully overlooked for him’s talents as a rapper, wot is dat about?
Today woz sports day, innit. Da school confiscated da hastroturf for football matches an’ other runnin’ about tings, preventin’ crews from accessin’ their rightful vape territory. As a peace hoffering to mandem da school said da gangstas dat is rubbish at sports can do a sports day rap battle. Nang, bruh! Peng nang!
Miss Jackson sed da rap ‘ad to be summink about da school. Man woz gonna do him’s rap about da old-time founding members dat da houses used to be named after, but a few years ago Miss Jackson kicked up a shitty-fit wiv da school coz dem’s woz some kind of dodgy traders in Hafrica, innit.
Miss told da school da names of da houses should be hinspirational bruvs, or gyals. So da school gave da houses new names an’ den Miss woz still ragin’. Man don’t get Miss Jackson sometimes.
So, Active J’s house is Bezos, Drilla’s is Musk, and Lady G is in Richard Branson house. Dem teachers made Active J wear da deadman house drip of da loud primary colour top wiv no brandin’, urgh! Man felt naked rappin’ wivout him’s North Face gangsta drip.
In da battle Drilla did him’s rap about da school dinners bein’ rank. Wasteman rhymed ‘pizza’ wiv ‘pizza’ four times. It woz da bare lamest ting hever. Active J busted freestyle rhymes about da hastroturf bein’ confiscated an’ blew dickhead Drilla haway. Bare brutal, bruh.
Den Lady G gets up an’ does a rap about diversity an’ equality, an’ wins da battle. Her sed nuffink about school, but got da huge happlause from staffdem an’ all da points. How is dat showin’ hequality.
Man was blowin’ fuses, fam, coz in man’s rap crew Lady G is da support rapper, innit, so heveryone knows Active J should av won. Wot a diss! But den staffdem opened the hastroturf an’ Lady G shared a can of Monster an’ a new Cookies n Cream vape wiv man, an’ all woz forgiven coz Bezos house won. Gassed!
