Wednesday, 26th February 2020

Bra enjoying its annual trip to the washing machine

A WOMAN’S bra is excited to finally be getting a f**king good wash. 

Donna Sheridan’s black M&S balconette brassiere has been worn for 365 days in a row without so much as a quick wipe down.

The bra said: “She’s worn me to the gym, to work, taken me dancing in clubs and even had sex in me. 

“I’m stiff, stained and I smell like a manky armpit yet still she puts me on day after day. 

“Knickers and socks get washed all the time yet all I can hope for is the occasional spray of some middle-of-the-range eau de toilette.   

“I’m pretty sure I only got put in the washing machine because I was stuck inside her favourite jumper.  

“I hesitate to use the word, but Donna is a slut.”