WORRIED this unique year of deprivation and confinement may fade from your memory? These six tattoos will ensure the coronavirus experience stays with you:
The Chinese for coronavirus
This beautiful character would look gorgeous on the nape of your neck and remind everyone of this magical time. For the more sentimental, get your favoured brand of crisps or spirits translated and inked to remember what most helped you suffocate your feelings.
Your favourite piece of furniture
Instead of Angkor Wat or Tierra del Fuego or some other exotic location you visited while travelling, get a permanent record of the place you spent most of 2020 in, ie your sofa, bed or garden shed.
A bog roll
Coming out the other side of this adventure, it’s important we remember to appreciate the things we might once have taken for granted. Glancing down at your forearm and seeing a bog roll stare back at you keeps you humble and connected to what really matters.
Rishi Sunak
Either the incredible chancellor who saved Britain or another of the stars of Britain’s favourite tea-time viewing, like debonair Matt Hancock, vein-pulsing Dominic Raab or furious-at-the-incompetence-she’s=projecting-on-others Priti Patel. Who would look better on your upper thigh?
Eyes on your eyelids
This way you’ll be able to continue your new napping habits even when you’re back working in the office again! Also, if you’ve got children, when the second wave hits you’ll be able to sleep your way through looking after them 24/7 and they’ll never know.
Keep 2m distant
Get this bold backpiece and nobody will ever come close to you again, apart from all the people who routinely ignore it in every supermarket, on every pavement, and in every other public space.
