THE world’s super-rich have been asked what’s so f**king amazing about yachts that they all feel obliged to lash out half a billion on them.
Following news that even Vladimir Putin has spent £500m on a yacht that looks like a big floating wedding cake, ordinary people are asking what on earth the appeal is.
Nathan Muir of Wrexham said: “I always assumed it was because you can’t be prosecuted in international waters, but now all the oligarchs are having theirs seized or can’t get them fuelled so that’s bollocks which makes it even more baffling.
“I’m sure it’s great when you’re in Venice, but you could just, like, live in Venice. And you don’t have to go far out to sea before it’s nothing but sea in every direction and it gets quite oppressive. I know, I’ve taken the ferry to the Isle of Man.
“What’s so great about sloshing about in a waterborne penthouse where all the staff live with you in cupboards? What’s the point of having a swimming pool on a boat? Is it not a bit like when retired couples live on a canal barge?
“Like private jets, castles in the mountains, Ferarris and 22-year-old Victoria’s Secret models, I get all that shit. I’d buy it tomorrow. But what’s the big deal with massive yachts?”
Oligarch Sergey Kirkorov said: “It f**king sucks. And I tell you what else I hate? All this shit modern art I have to buy.”