A WOMAN has bought an expensive, brightly coloured coat that she is too embarrassed to step outside in.
Lauren Hewitt saw the ankle-length faux-fur orange coat in the sales and convinced herself it was incredibly stylish, before getting it home and realising it made her look like a massive twat.
Hewitt said: “In the subtle lighting of the shop changing room I thought I looked edgy and cool, but when I put it on in front of my bedroom mirror I realised I looked like a cheap teddy bear that you’d win at a fair.
“I forced myself to wear it, but as I reached the doorstep I saw my neighbour’s five-year-old in the street wearing a coat the exact same hideously garish colour. At least she’s got an excuse. I bought this for myself.
“I know I should hold my head high and style it out like Kate Moss would, but unfortunately I’m not Kate Moss. I’m an accountant from Quedgeley who now looks like a bellend on the bus to work.”
Her flatmate said: “It’s not that bad. She should feel more embarrassed about that undercut she persists in thinking suits her.”