Woman taking karaoke seriously ruins evening for 94 people

A WOMAN has ruined a pleasant night out for everyone in a pub by taking the karaoke far too seriously.

Amateur singer Donna Sheridan drained the fun from her local over a three-hour period as she doggedly insisted on showing off her strained warbling to a room full of exhausted drinkers.

Sheridan said: “For some people being bad at karaoke is all part of the fun. But I think if something’s worth doing, it’s worth doing properly.

“As usual I decided to kick off with a husky rendition of ‘Wuthering Heights’. I hit the wrong note a couple of times, but I just started again from the beginning and nailed it on the third go.

“I couldn’t hear any complaints over the sound of my ear-splitting singing so I don’t think anyone minded. Then it was onto karaoke classics like ‘I Will Always Love You’. People definitely want to hear that again.

“It’s a shame none of my mates had time for a go, but times flies when you’re screaming ‘I can’t live, if living is without you’ into the mic.”

Friend Tom Booker said: “You should hear her when she sings ‘Happy Birthday to You’. By which I mean you shouldn’t.”

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Month's weather to happen in an hour

THE weather for the whole of the next 30 days is to take place in a single hour this afternoon, forecasters have confirmed. 

According to meteorologists, all the weather Britain was scheduled to receive between now and March 21st will arrive between 2.18pm and 3.18pm today. 

The public has been advised to stay indoors, build flood defences, wear at least factor 50 sun cream, prepare to clear snow on their drives and be aware a hosepipe ban may be enforced. 

BBC weatherman Martin Bishop said: “An area of unprecedented high pressure and a mirror area of unprecedented low pressure, combined with a tachyon storm, means that all regions can expect the lot. All at once. 

“Lightning will strike from a glorious cloudless sky, it’ll be too foggy to see, and six inches of snow will fall and be washed down the streets in mini-icebergs by the torrential rain. 

“After that we’ll have had our allotted weather until late March. The sky will be blank white and the temperature neutral for a month, plunging Britain into a deep crisis because we will have nothing to talk about.”