MONTHLY liaisons with escorts are the main hidden cost of being single, it has emerged.
Rent, energy bills and council tax were recently highlighted as being more expensive for single people, but none of them compare to the sums loveless losers need to fork out for sex.
Singleton Jack Browne said: “It’s not just the escort’s time, which is f**king pricey. You’ve also got to pay for a taxi to the hotel room you’ve booked under a fake name. It all adds up.
“People in relationships don’t get it. If they fancy a shag they can just roll over in bed and start smooching their partner for free. Sure, you might have to sometimes buy flowers if you’re a bloke, but they’re not that expensive. A tenner for sex is great value.
“Meanwhile I’ve got to drop a couple hundred even for a handjob. You don’t have to be Martin Lewis to know that’s a bad deal. No offence, Chanel, if you’re reading this.
“And don’t forget the psychological cost of banging a stranger with fillers you hired from a dodgy website. The only way to make the shame go away is to visit an expensive therapist. It’s no wonder I can’t save for a deposit.”
However Tom Booker said: “I’m not convinced this is a real problem. I just shag cheap prostitutes on work trips when the hotel’s paid for. My wife’s always saying we need to save money.”
