Friday, 28th February 2020

'I was hoping you'd have a lightsaber,' says woman on arriving at date's flat

A WOMAN confirmed that she made the right choice of sexual partner when seeing a replica lightsaber mounted on the wall of his home. 

Emma Bradford confessed that she was not entirely sure that Tom Logan was the kind of man she wanted to make love to until she saw the lightsaber, which she immediately recognised as Qui-Gon Jinn’s personal weapon from The Phantom Menace. 

She said: “He’d said he liked Star Wars, but all men say that because they know it’s what women want to hear.

“But when I saw the lightsaber, an official licenced prop that must have cost him well over £200, I knew that he was the real deal and that my needs as a woman would be satisfied that night. And boy, were they.”

Logan said: “To be honest I wanted to tell Emma about the lightsaber – it comes with a Certificate of Authenticity, showing it’s 1,665 of 2,000 – on the very first date.

“But there are so many fake bitches out there looking to score with any guy who’s got the 7,541 piece Ultimate Lego Millennium Falcon that I kept it to myself.”

Bradford said: “He even made love like a Jedi. Yoda.”