A MARRIED man who has enjoyed no fewer than three sexual encounters in 2023 has declared it to be a landmark year for him sexually.
As the year draws to a close, 54-year-old Nathan Muir believes it should also be viewed as the sunset of a golden era of marital shagging, specifically in his house.
Brushing away a tear, he said: “After 2021 and 2022, who expected this? This late flowering of a familiar yet ardent sexuality?
“The first time was in March and that came out of nowhere, because normally when I’m groping my wife’s boobs she just shrugs me off, but instead she surprised me by being up for it even though it was after 11pm.
“Honestly, that would have been enough for me. But then it happens again on holiday, in the morning this time, and I don’t think the smile left my face all summer. That was quite the encounter. Lasted upwards of ten minutes.
“Then, beyond my wildest expectations, I chanced my arm with a casual ‘How about it?’ in October and lo and behold we’re at it again like a pair of horny teenagers. Magic.
“I doubt I’ll have another year like this one in my lifetime. But I’ll still be wanking on this one until 2028.”
