Friday, 4th December 2020

Married couple who spontaneously had sex still reeling

A MARRIED couple who spontaneously had sex with each other cannot get over the shock.

Tom and Eleanor Shaw, who have been together for eleven years, previously believed they had slipped comfortably into a sexless union of convenience that would last the rest of their lives.

Eleanor Shaw said: “I thought we’d reached the stage where we felt towards each other like siblings who weirdly had kids, and all our shagging was done.

“But then last night, it just happened. There was no birthday obligation or anything. Just raw, animal sex, if the animals had done it so many times previously that they had developed a well worn routine.

“We’ve decided to celebrate this landmark day as another anniversary. Then we’ll feel obliged to make ourselves have run-of-the-mill sex one more time per year.

“Well, maybe. Or we might just sack it off and watch Succession again.”