Thursday, 29th October 2020

Teenagers on awkward first dates back in the bowling alleys

TEENAGERS planning toe-curlingly awkward first dates with long-time crushes are thrilled that bowling alleys are open again. 

Adolescents with raging desires but no idea how to talk to the opposite sex have had nowhere to date because Nando’s is full of middle-aged dads on vouchers and cinemas are closed.

Year 10 pupil Joshua Hudson said: “I’m taking Grace from my Geography class out on the lanes tonight. We’ve been in touch every day through lockdown. Well, we like each other’s Instagram stories.

“I’m going to make sure I use the heaviest ball there is to really show her how manly I am. Then I’ll buy her some chicken nuggets and a Slush Puppie — my treat. My mum’s lent me a fiver.”

Grace Wood-Morris said: “I’ve never been bowling, but I’ll pretend I have to seem sophisticated, then largely look at the ground and not say anything.

“Will we follow social distancing? Yes, but only until the last five minutes when he puts his arm around me after a successful strike and we kiss, then look away panicking, then kiss again, then excuse each other while we text ‘OMG’ to all our mates.

“It’s just such a romantic place, you know? And boys look so sexy in bowling shoes.”