A WOMAN on a first date is eagerly awaiting the approaching moment when she will briefly be allowed to speak.
After 95 minutes listening to Oliver O’Connor elaborate on his career, family, interests, former relationships, cars, childhood traumas and cats past and present, Grace Wood-Morris believes the moment when she will be invited to say a few words is about to arrive.
She said: “There was a brief gap, just after the waiter cleared the starters, when I thought my chance had come before he launched into a monologue about almost learning to play banjo.
“I took several running jumps at trying to interrupt, but he didn’t notice any of them. At one point, while he was summarising Succession, I feigned choking but only the table next door noticed.
“Trying to force out my piece like a taxi nudging into traffic didn’t work. He kept cutting across me so I only managed one word to his seven. It became a game to see how many times he could interrupt a single sentence. His best was 12.
“I wonder if he knows women can speak? He’s surely seen them do it in films. But then there are magic flying dogs in films.”
O’Connor said: “She was okay to talk at but I’m not sure there was a deeper connection. She kept interrupting, which was rude. What could she have to say that’s so important? Something about handbags?”
