A WOMAN who believes she is a brilliant matchmaker is actually just inflicting misery on her single friends, it has emerged.
Happily married Donna Sheridan is continually trying to forge relationships between friends with slight similarities despite none of them ever being remotely successful.
She said: “Pete’s been single for two years and so has Kate. I just know they’d be perfect together because they’ve both been divorced and like lasagne.
“Okay, setting up Lucy with Josh led to them basically having rows for eight months then splitting up. But I think she just didn’t make the effort to enjoy his bongos.
“I just have a really strong intuition about who would be great together. What can go wrong if you listen to your gut?”
Friend Nikki Hollis said: “There’s something wrong with Nikki’s gut because the last acquaintance she set me up with insisted on praying to ‘Mother Gaia’ before we ate and was generally a wanker.”
Sheridan said: “Do I hear wedding bells?”