Woman would, if she’s honest with herself, shag that builder

A WOMAN idling at traffic lights by a building site has privately admitted that she would shag that one in the hi-viz. 

Accountant Carolyn Ryan was driving through central Birmingham when she found herself, almost against her will, conceding that there is just something about a man with cement splashes up his trousers and no top that gets her motor running.

She continued: “I like a bookish sort of bloke, well-educated, who respects women and speaks at least two languages. Also, that thick brickie can get it whenever he wants.

“I know, I know, it’s such a bloody cliche but come on, look at the muscles on that bastard. It’d be like having a go on a bouncy castle. And there’s something refreshing about a man who doesn’t understand anything.

“We’d do it once before he’d washed or anything, then he could shower all the grime and filth off and we’d do it again. After that he could have a look at that loose slab on the patio.”

Builder Wayne Hayes said: “Yep, I love a dirty posh bird especially if they’ve got big knockers.

“Just kidding. I’m gay.”