GROUNDBREAKING research has revealed that everyone inhabits their own personal universe which rarely intersects with others.
The findings posit billions of universes which come into existence and blink out every day, but most are impossible to reach because it’s so hard to be bothered.
Professor Henry Brubaker, of the Institute for Studies, said: “My breakthrough came when we fired a young intern in our lab.
The domino effect of that one simple decision saw him dumped by his girlfriend, evicted from his flat and forced into work as a security guard.
I suddenly realised that an incident of little import in my world I sacked him on a whim because of his annoying haircut had massive repercussions in his, and that boring parallel universes were closer to us than we ever imagined.”
Wayne Hayes of Nottingham said: Like all the great scientific discoveries, its perfectly obvious in retrospect.
In the history of my universe, for example, the defeat of Hitler by Churchill and the allies was a major turning point. But in my wifes universe, thats a forgotten historical footnote compared to the epoch-changing break-up of Jordan and Peter Andre.
Incredible to think that all this time, theres been a parallel universe right there with me on the sofa.
“And it completely explains why its impossible for me to pay attention to her stories about who said what to who at work, because in my universe those people simply don’t exist.