THE Church of England has managed to appoint a female bishop within half a century of humans setting foot on another world.
The church’s progress was hailed as awe-inspiring, while thousands of dizzy Anglicans grabbed onto bannisters and the backs of chairs.
A Church spokesman said: “We’re very proud that we achieved this before teleportation became a reality.
“At times it felt like being on a runaway train.”
The Right Reverend Julian Cook, a member of the Church’s General Synod, said: “I remember watching the moon landing and thinking anything was possible except female bishops.
“It’s science fiction come to life. I just hope the female bishops are more like Sigourney Weaver rather than a 15 foot-tall alien bitch queen.”