Monday, 6th July 2020

Twitter storm of f**k all interest to any normal person enters sixth day

A ROW about an obscure thing normal people do not care about has been raging in the Twittersphere for almost a week.

The argument has generated thousands of heated responses from social media obsessives and the usual 40 influential Twitter people who surely have better things to do with their time.

Twitter user Martin Bishop said: “JK Rowling, Piers Morgan, Owen Jones, David Baddiel, Giles Coren and Katie Hopkins have all made their feelings clear.

“This tsunami of a Twitter storm is clearly very important because there’ve also been tweets from Gary Lineker, Julia Hartley-Brewer and the bloke Alan Partridge said ‘Smell my cheese!’ to.

“I hardly need repeat what was in the original tweet because unless you’re a hermit who doesn’t monitor Twitter second-by-second you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about.

“Suffice to say it shows that we’ve become a nation of snowflakes, or fascists, or indeed a nation of fascist snowflakes.”

However pensioner Mary Fisher said: “Twitty what? It's not raining, is it? Excuse me, I have to go and buy some sausages for our tea.”