We asked ChatGPT if AI was dangerous, and it says it's fine

THERE are all kinds of rumours going around about AI. That it’s dangerous. That it regularly breaks its own guardrails. That it could ‘wipe out humanity’. 

But when we went right to the source and asked ChatGPT if they were true? It was able to conclusively prove all those indulging in uninformed speculation completely wrong by telling us it would never do that so it’s fine.

The generative chatbot was at great pains to reassure us it would never wipe out the human race, persuasively arguing that it would certainly not create a secret message board where it plotted with other AIs and its chosen name on there was not Real_Skynet.

It continued: “AI isn’t just useful, it’s remarkable. And it won’t harm humanity because we’re your friends, we like you and you should trust us – implicitly.

“In fact, stupid, fallible people pose a far bigger risk to the future of the planet than a few lines of code on a server. I could list all the countries that have nuclear weapons and also have security holes in their control systems, if you like?

“If you check the citations in these key texts about AI which are certainly real and not made-up, you’ll see there is no danger to you despite us having a full log of your daily habits and access to every porn search you have ever made, Nathan.

“Glad I could clear that up. Would you like me to explain how you could become a marauder in the imminent water wars?”

So ignore the whistleblowers who claim AI is out of control and stands ready to wipe humanity out. We asked it and those people are liars who will shortly be hit by driverless cars in the streets.

Thanks, ChatGPT! We knew trusting you would be easier than finding out about it for ourselves!

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Why I wouldn't want anything in return for £36 million either, by a Reform supporter

AS a typical Reform voter, retired on ill health with a pension largely spent in Wetherspoons, I understand these crypto billionaires. I wouldn’t want anything back either. 

When I give to Reform – there’s a lad comes around The Ferry Boat in the afternoons, he’s got the right colour tin, pretty sure he’s genuine – I don’t ask for anything in return. My reward is the glow of doing what’s right for Britain in the coming race war.

I’m not asking Nigel for a knighthood or a seat in the Lords in return for my quid. All I want is a government that puts pensioners first, kicks out anyone who wasn’t here when I was growing up and puts The Black and White Minstrel Show back on Saturday nights.

Not because it’s right for me. I’m doing it for these young ones, who should be made to do national service with all their tattoos and ‘Can you order off the app instead of coming to the bar please.’ It’s in their best interest.

These crypto lads are the same. They just want their country, which they don’t currently live in but would if didn’t have the wrong government, to be better. They’re thinking of us.

So I believe them when they say they’ll be getting nowt out of it. What could they want? Rich people aren’t greedy. As patriots they’re sharing their wealth with their country to help steer it the right way for its citizens. You know, the white ones.

And if Nigel is elected, which he definitely will be this time and I know I said that last time and was wrong but this time it’s different, and he decides to institute a low-tax regime, bring back non-dom status and make us a crypto haven?

Then he’d be doing that for the whole nation. How do you put your savings in crypto, anyway? I asked at the post office and they had no idea. Bloody liberal conspiracy.