49-year-old teased about his bike

A MIDDLE-AGED man is very upset after being teased about having a cheap bike.

49-year-old Roy Hobbs joined a cycling club to make new friends, but the other middle-aged boys in the group have been teasing him because his bike cost less than £2,500.

Hobbs’s wife Angela said: “When Roy got in from cycling he went straight upstairs without having any tea, slamming the bedroom door after himself.

“I persuaded him to let me come in and he was curled up on the bed, wiping his eyes ‘because he had a fly or a bit of grit in them’.

“It finally emerged that the others in the club had been saying things like ‘nice bike’ in an ironic way and using ‘Roy’s bike’ as a term for anything rubbish.

“Apparently the ringleader is called Alan, who is 53 and a dentist. I said I was going to ring his wife and let her know what has been going on, but apparently he’s divorced.

“I told Roy that maybe Alan was being mean because really he felt sad about his marriage breaking down. Often bullies are really just unhappy.”

However Roy Hobbs said: “I thought they were my friends but actually they’re just horrible. They need to grow up and see there’s more to life than having a cool bike.”

He added:  “Alan has a small willy and I could beat him up if I wanted to.”

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Ryanair cancellations 'act of kindness in many ways'

FLIGHT cancellations mean that thousands will be spared the ordeal of travelling with Ryanair, it has emerged.

With the budget airline cancelling hundreds of flights over the coming weeks, many customers have realised that at least they won’t have to endure the horrors for which they had braced themselves.

Ryanair customer Nikki Hollis said: “I won’t miss the feeling of being crammed in like a calf on some documentary about inhumane farming methods.

“I’m a bit disappointed my flight’s off, but I suppose it’s like buying a set of kitchen knives from a 99p shop. You can’t really be surprised when they don’t do what you’d hoped.”

Would-be passenger Tom Booker said: “On one hand I wanted a cheap holiday, on the other that fanfare thing Ryanair plays when the plane lands freaks me out.

“I mean, what sort of airline congratulates itself on a safe landing?”