ARE you on, or going to, an island that is on fire for your holiday? Lawyer Denys Finch Hatton explains why this is entirely your responsibility:
We’re due to fly to Rhodes this week. Can we cancel?
Of course you can, while paying in full. It’s hardly the airline’s fault that Rhodes is ardenti inferno right now, is it? If they are willing to fly you to the hot zone then they have fulfilled their legal duties. You might want to be evacuated. That might be why you’re going.
If I want to fly home early am I entitled to a refund?
Absolutely not. That’s your decision. If your airline or travel agent decides you’re unsafe it will arrange a flight. Which it won’t, because you’re safely sleeping on the floor of a gymnasium and the wildfires are at least a mile away until the wind changes.
Does my travel insurance cover wildfires?
Is it called wildfire insurance? No? Then of course it f**king doesn’t. It covers you for travel, losing bags, etcetera. Wildfires are merely a natural feature of the environment and you’re no more covered for them than for sunburn. You people want something for nothing.
Will my health insurance cover wildfire injuries?
Yes, with caveats. If you wilfully remained in the area of wildfires rather than paying for an immediate flight home or flew in when wildfires were raging or have contributed to climate change in the past then no. There are always exceptions.
We were evacuated, lost our luggage, and flown home after two days. Are we entitled to compensation?
Are you f**k. After your travel agent went to all that trouble? Do you ask a fireman for compensation when he’s carrying you from your burning home? And it sounds like you left your luggage to burn, so it’s your fault. In fact the resort owner has grounds for suit as your luggage was flammable material with which you deliberately fed the flames.
Free fruit provided by a relief effort post-evacuation gave me diarrhoea. Can I sue?
That’s more like it. Screwing governments and charities out of cash is what the legal profession exists for. Yes, you can sue for the entire cost of your holiday, a whole new wardrobe, and compensation for emotional distress and ongoing anxiety. I await your instructions.
