CHILDREN named after characters from Game of Thrones are now old enough to be in secondary school, their teachers have confirmed.
The children, whose fault it is technically not, are now attending comprehensives and being treated as if their names are perfectly normal by their peers.
Teacher Joanna Kramer said: “I’ve had two Khaleesis, a Joffrey and a Sansa already. And it’s just beginning.
“By 2028 every third name will be from Game of Thrones. We’re only months away from seeing Cersei 4 Tyrion carved into a desk. And of course none of them have actually seen it because it’s boring old people shit.
“A Daenerys – though not spelt like that, not spelt anything even close to that – asked me what it was about. I said it was essentially musical chairs but with dragons. She seemed happy with that.”
Headteacher Eleanor Shaw said: “It’s always like this. The most glamorous names get given to the most ordinary children. I was in classes with an Alexis and a Fallon and they’ve both ended up working in a chicken-gutting plant.
“I regret these Aryas will have to resit their GCSE maths if they want to get a diploma in nail art, and those Khaleesis look like they’ll be suspended for smoking weed.”